Mamas & Papas article: From Womanhood to Motherhood

Hello my friends!

Just a brief post to let you know there is a really helpful article that any new mother would benefit from, in the latest (May 2014 issue) of Mamas & Papas magazine, here in South Africa.

It has been broken down into 5 ‘steps’ to acquaint yourself with when you are moving from Womanhood into Motherhood – and if you have already received your badge of Motherhood, then these would wonderful reminders to share as support and insight for other mothers starting out on there new journey into motherhood.

Sally Baker of Birth Support and I were intereviewed for the artice by Loren Stow. I am so thrilled at how well the message of the depth of motherhood being multi-layered cam across in the article.

Enjoy the read!

Love to you all

Colette

 

Page 42 Mamas & Papas Issue May 2014

Page 42
Mamas & Papas
Issue May 2014

Page 43 Mamas & Papas Issue May 2014

Page 43
Mamas & Papas
Issue May 2014

 

Page 44 Mamas & Papas Issue May 2014

Page 44
Mamas & Papas
Issue May 2014


BEYOND Breastfeeding

Breastfeeding was a definite for me. I had suffered dreadful thrush in my nipples after the birth of my first daughter and landed up cold turkey weaning her at 2 weeks so that my boobs and their open sores could heal. It took me weeks to heal. For 2 weeks I did not feed her at all, followed by 4 weeks of slowly re-latching her to breastfeed and supplementing until we were 100% back on ‘Boob Only’. I fed my first daughter for 2 years exactly. And we loved it. She was my ‘booby-baby’ and was not interested in food for ages. Breastfeeding for me had been a hard beginning, but 100% worth it. I am so happy when I have a little person tucked into my arms, who is safe, warm & feeling loved.

On the subject of weaning, I was torn between weaning cold turkey & self-weaning. I went with weaning cold turkey, using bitter aloe on my nipples. Why? Complete lack of sleep as my daughter was a non-sleeper and woke 9+ times a night! Sleep deprivation was affecting me big time. I thought if I take breastfeeding out of the equation, I could get her to sleep better and just get me some sleep too. And it worked.

After the birth of my second daughter I had Shingles and was (ignorantly) advised by the doctor to not feed my baby due to the meds. So, for the 2nd time in my life I had to stop breastfeeding a brand new, little person of mine. She was weaned at 5 days old. After 8 days and many tears, I successfully re-latched my daughter to continue with exclusive breastfeeding for ages. I knew I could do it – I’d done it before. I was born to breastfeed.

When my second daughter was 2 years & 5 months, and I was going back to gym & was assuming that my milk supply would dwindle to nothing, I wrote in my daughter’s book: “…and shortly you will have weaned yourself from my breast. I was always committed to giving you 2 years of breastfeeding, and so very easily those 2 years came, and went. Now as you stand at 29 months, I can see and feel how natural, right and easy it has been for us to just carry on together. I knew with you that I wasn’t going to do a ‘cold turkey’ to bring breastfeeding to an end, I didn’t need to. Our breastfeeding relationship has been an easy one. I was made to BF! I love it! I love that it is nutritious nurturance. I love that it is easy & convenient. I love that it grows you in so many different ways. The way we look into each other’s eyes when you feed, makes me love, feel in love, feel loved, help me be loving and know love. My satisfaction comes from knowing how your touch and my boobs, your suckling and my holding arms can almost cure all and any of your woes and wobbles. We fill each other up when you feed.”

“Now of course, not every feed is a dream, though most are, because of course there have been times when I’ve gotten annoyed that you want boob when I’m busy with work or needing to cook supper. There have been times when at night, all I’ve wanted you to do is sleep – not feed – so that I can sleep too. There are times you struggle to drink when your nose is all stuffy and blocked. However, all of those not so fun feeds are but a drop in the ocean. I have tears in my eyes as I write these words knowing that not only will you miss breastfeeding, but that I will too! It is the one act as a mother that really makes me feel like a mom. I hold you close in my arms, your little body snuggled into mine, your wet little mouth, holding safely within it, my nipple. Beauty. Innocence. Perfection. Nurturance. Joy. Love.”

I did not lose my milk supply – nor did I lose my biggest fan of my ability to breastfeed: My daughter! We just kept right on at it. Then, when she was nearing 3 years old, I went through a time feeling like the tail was wagging the dog. I felt that she had moved through ‘needing’ boob to ‘having’ me. She had needed me & BF to comfort her when she was ill, sore or tired. Now it felt like she could get me to ‘jump’ at her command. I wasn’t over the moon with this feeling, but I applied adult thought to it and decided to honour the fact that as she was about to be 3, it must be her way of showing me that she was now needing to exert some more definite sense of independence of Self. And so I embraced it by weaning her after her 3rd birthday.

Not once did I ask if I was ready. Not once did I question whether I felt this was the right thing to do – I thought my way through it and knowing I had weaned using aloe before, I chose to do it again. It was heartache! I cried and cried! Big tears. Lots.

Although I had prepared her & used aloe on my nipples, she responded to my boobs with “Sgustim” (disgusting). My experience with her sister was that it was ‘done & dusted’ – my other daughter never having looked back or asking for boob again. My youngest however, often asked me for boob, and then backed away as they got too close.

To process the pain I was going through I even drew a picture of us breastfeeding together. It was soothing.
processing my pain

On sharing my misery with a friend, she flippantly suggested putting honey on my nipples and re-latching my little girl that way. So, that night, as my daughter tried again to nestle into my boobs, I gave her my honey coated nipples and voila! We were feeding again. Thank you Honey! So for the second time with my younger daughter, I was successful at re-latching her. I was thrilled & elated. And it felt right.

And now, as I write this, she is 4 years & 4 months and we are still breastfeeding. It is only at night and on wake up. But it is something that still feeds us both. I feel that for her it is still something she needs AND enjoys. It has also proved invaluable during those times of illness, when her chest gets her down – and my chest (my boobs) still brings her comfort when she is not feeling comfortable herself. Breastfeeding is our time together. For a while longer…


The Picture of Birth

For us to improve and change, for the better, the birth habits and ways of the birthing world generally, as it is currently, we have to change the picture of birth that young girls have in their heads.

 

If you think of pictures as references for young girls and women and you think of how birth is portrayed in the media – you think screaming, yelling, chaos, woman lying on her back, stirrups, doctors, hospitals, fear, pain, difficulty, pushing, panting, aggression and noise and probably lots more. And you’ve not seen this picture/reference only once! You will have seen this reference to how birth ‘looks’ multiple times in all forms of media from TV ads and series, to movies and reality TV.

Media Portrayal of Birth

Media Portrayal of Birth

 

Now how many times have you or a girl or young woman seen a birth that is natural? At home? Peace-full? A midwife & doula present? Supporting the mother to birth her baby? Serene? Powerful? Dimly lit? Loving? Welcoming? Utilising water as a form of pain relief? Rarely – if ever, I bet.

 

The negative portrayal of births in the public sphere creates subconscious levels of fear and powerlessness in the minds of girls and young women who see them. In fact, it just as easily imprints itself on the men of our communities too. Very often these portrayals are done with humour and comedy as the focus, further dulling the potential for the viewers to realise just how ‘wrong’ and unwelcoming for a baby those births actually are.

 

In addition to the media-styled pictures young women are exposed frequently to before they are faced with birthing their own babies, girls and young women will have been exposed to the ‘pictures’ of birth as described by their mothers, sisters, grandmothers and girlfriends of the world – birth stories that focus on the problems, pain, danger, powerlessness, struggle, separation and trauma that is the Negative Birth Story. This is because these women have had these negative experiences that robbed them of a truly honoured birth experience. They have to process and keep processing their birth stories. But in doing so, they pass on the Negative Birth Story and continue the cycle of poor birthing practices from generation to generation. I do not condone these mothers keeping their hurts and birth stories quiet or hidden. Quite the opposite in fact!!! But mindfulness & healing needs to be applied so as to re-create these negatives into the Positive Birthing Stories for the people who experienced them, AND as a reference for the women who will listen to these stories and be exposed to the Positive Birthing Story as guidelines, for their own bodies, births and birthing abilities in the future.

 

So if you have daughters, nieces, granddaughters etc, of any age, be mindful of how you share the story of birth with them. Actively seek out positive pictures so as to reinforce the powerful beauty that is the birthing body. Set in place, while the daughters of our world are still young, the valuable references they need for them to overcome the challenges that is the current birthing climate of this world. Below is a kiddies story that is wonderful at showing the natural and welcoming way of receiving babies, whilst also honouring the age old skills of the midwives. The story underlines the magic & power that is the WOMAN.

http://www.mamamidwife.com/read-the-book.html

Article 1b pic

 

Another beneficial book, for younger readers – Beautiful Girl presents this simple but important message: that to be born a girl is a very special thing and carries with it magical gifts and powers that must be recognized and nurtured. Through these empowering words and illustrations, little girls will learn how their bodies are perfect just the way they are, the importance of treating themselves with gentle care, and how changes are just a part of growing up. Dr. Christiane Northrup believes that reading and discussing this book with your girls will help them to value the wonder and uniqueness of their bodies and have positive benefits that will last throughout their lives. http:// www.drnorthrup.com

Beautiful Girl by Christiane Northrup MD

Beautiful Girl by Christiane Northrup MD

 

For a more grown-up understanding of the power of imprinting and how it affects mothers and birthing, visit Elena Tonetti’s http://birthintobeing.com/ and read about Limbic Imprinting.

 

“Peace on Earth begins with Birth” – Elena Tonetti


I Birthed My Tooth

Nurtured-Babies.com is a contender for the Top 25 Book Author Moms – 2012! Just a quick reminder that the deadline for votes is coming up in 8 days on Dec 7, 2012.

You, my fan, can vote for me once a day until that deadline, and earn me a spot on the Top 25 list, which will be presented to Circle of Moms’ six million members.

Please click on the Circle of Moms button to your right.

 

 

Hi there my friends!

 

You are wondering how on earth can this crazy woman thinks she has “birthed” her tooth!

 

Really?

A tooth?

 

Yes!!!

 

-          give birth to. To bring forth.

 

For an age now (ever since some silly dentist did unnecessary root canal on my one tooth), one of my implants – and incisor – has been slightly loose. And slowly gotten more loose. I was advised that I’d need to have this wobbly tooth (Yes! I felt like a kid again – wiggling it over and over with my tongue) cut out/removed. Eeeeek. And after wearing a plate with a fake tooth on for 3-6 months, letting the bone grow, I could then have a new implant put it.

 

Simple enough.

 

Except, like for birthing of babies, I’m not super crazy on hospitals and all things medical.

 

So I cancelled the appointment that had been scheduled for me to have this naughty, wobbly tooth taken out – and decided I’d let my body ‘let go’ of the tooth when it was ready. Just like a baby…

 

And so for a good few months, it just stayed slightly wobbly and really not a problem in my life at all.

 

Until last weekend.

 

Suddenly I was faced with a very loose tooth – clearly happy now to let go of its warm little home in my bone. And worse still, the tooth had dropped! (I hadn’t given this thought when I bravely decided that no dentist was going to be cutting this little one out.) I now had a very loose tooth AND the titanium was showing! Omigoddess – the tooth was dropping and I looked like I was a bionic woman!

 

And honestly, it was also sore.

 

OW.

 

Not sore enough for me that I was going to take pain killers – not keen on those – but enough to make me a bit like a grizzly bear. Ask my daughters, it wasn’t fun.

 

I knew there was no infection – just tenderness and pain all the way up right side of my face. Breathe.

 

Sunday was even worse – grumps-wise and metal showing tooth-wise.

 

Monday morning I truly played with how I would manage getting past the dentist’s receptionist to ask for an emergency appointment to have this now very achey and very unattractive tooth taken out quickly. I did, it was that sore and inconvenient. You try eating with a tooth hanging onto your bone, by some bone…

 

And then I took another breathe – got over the fact that phoning the dentist and admitting defeat was more of a pain to me than the tooth – and decided that night to dose myself up with a mega bunch of silica tissue salts and homeopathic remedies (and trust like heck that my other implant wasn’t affected). Now Silica is known for removing foreign objects from the human body such as splinters, etc.

 

Well, guess what. It worked on my implant too.

 

YAYEEEEEEEEEEEE!

 

In the morning, it felt different. I decided to tweak it. Gently. And you know what, it just came away gently.

 

And my first thought:

 

WHAT A CLEVER BODY I HAVE!

 

For those of you that know me, I have not thought this, felt this or appreciated this about my body for a very long time. Probably a lifetime actually.

 

So for me to think “I have a Clever Body” was huge for me. It was also spontaneous and beautiful. Because it showed me that I have shifted and changed. It showed me that although I didn’t ‘get this’ in time to birth my two daughters myself (the gynaes & their scalpels did that), I did get to birth my own tooth.

 

And I did it in my own time. With my own choices. I was enabled to take my own actions and feel my own feelings. No one was telling me how it should be.

 

I did it!

 

And now I know – if I have a 3rd baby, my body is clever and can birth a baby, in its own time and on our terms.

 

Had to share this ‘biggie’’ for me.

Wishing you all an amazing weekend

 

Love to you

Colette


Crying: A blessing

Good Morning friends!

I’ve had a such a pleasure these last 2 weeks. Sharing my knowledge and interest with other moms.

A new mom friend, who has the heart and insight to know that moms deserve more than they are getting from their gynaes, ante natal classes and books or magazines, approached me to ask if I wouldn’t mind talking and sharing some of my views on pregnancy and parenting with her ‘yoga moms’. (Isabel teaches a wonderfully gentle and supportive Tri yoga pre-natal class to pregnant moms AND post natal yoga to new moms that are giving back to themselves by honouring their bodies’ need for movement and exercise….)

Anyway – I digress

I said “YES!” to Isabel & “Let’s give it a whirl! We won’t know unless we try”

I came in at the end of a post natal class and had the privilege of having 4 mothers listen to me and allow me time to share my caring and my views on Crying, A blessing, with them. And as much as I was a lot nervous and some excited, I trusted and jumped into the chat with the intention to:

– trust what I have to share
– know that they will hear what they need to hear
– be genuine
– connect by sharing my stories
– honour where each of them are in their journey
– show that i am of service, if they need it
– proceed to follow up with them

Did you know that crying is the body’s way of actually getting out the stress hormones released when you encounter stresses physically, mentally or emotionally?

Did you know that the tears actually carry this ‘baggage’ out of your system so that you can move past the experience to enable you to be free to live in the moment, be healthy and therefore THRIVE?

And babies and toddlers know this! They are so WISE.

Definitely something we can learn from them. (Note to self: get more of my tears out…)

AND

It is something we need to support and encourage for them to continue doing.

There is no crying without purpose. Whether we understand why the child has these stresses, tears and pent up emotions needing release doesn’t matter. What matters is that we are aware that babies, like us, can also have stuff they need to get ‘off their chest’ and that we can lovingly assist them to do this so that they are able to thrive.

We need to provide space, safe arms and an accepting attitude of awareness, that allow them to feel what they feel, whilst we just love them unconditionally.

We repress crying in babies and children by:

  • Telling baby/child to stop crying
  • Punishments/Threats
  • Withdrawing love or isolating the child
  • Distraction through talk, walk, music, movement etc
  • Putting something in child’s mouth (dummy, food, sweets)
  • Teasing, shaming
  • Denying or minimising the child’s pain
  • Getting the child to laugh or talk whilst trying to cry (a form of distraction)
  • Praising the child for NOT crying
  • Giving drugs

Suggestions I shared with the moms listening, to help them on their journey to be able to le their babies cry, were to:

  1. Read Aletha Solter’s books listed on her website, especially Tears and Tantrums: What to Do When Babies and Children Cry, Published in 1998, (Birth to 8 years of age)
    ISBN-10: 0-9613073-6-6, ISBN-13: 978-0-9613073-6-3
  2. Educate your spouse & family as to the benefits of letting your baby cry their stresses & pains out. This way you can build the support you and your baby need to navigate this journey of parenting with awareness.
  3. Deal with your issues and views on crying.
    Look at your approach to crying for yourself – do you get it all out, or do you repress the urge to cry?
  4. Identify the ways in which your parents repressed your crying, how this made you feel and how these feelings may still have their consequences felt today within your own emotional burdens.
  5. Practise this new method as and how you can, remembering to be gentle with yourself. It is an emotionally charged topic, let alone practice. You can master this ability, one day at a time.

So, to you I ask you to look at your feelings towards crying – not just in babies and children – but your attitude towards your own crying habits too…

 

Explore this topic more and know that we all want to thrive – and CRYING is a superb way to allow us to get rid of the sore and not so nice feelings we may experience, in a swift manner, so we can get on with living our lives with joy & pleasure.

In love and with joy to you

Colette

PS I loved the sharing with & talking to the moms – no not the sound of my own voice – but rather to be the somebody engaging & opening my hands of support. In fact I enjoy being able to make someone else’s journey a better one.


Sharing. Can you answer some questions?

Hiya!
Looking at Birth as a business and trying to understand it from all sorts of angles, I was wondering at a few things. So below I’ve put down some questions that I would love your insights and sharing on. Could you help me with that? I’d love to hear from you.

Noo in my tum

What were/are your 3 top frustrations you experience in relation to being pregnant & giving birth?

In a nutshell, my 3 were:
1. Being led to believe that hospitals are mother centred and caring
2. Not finding care-givers and services that supported my desire to learn more about myself and what I was experiencing emotionally, so that I could create the best support and care for myself
3. Medical aids and their lack of support for MY birth choices

What about your frustrations keeps/kept you up at night?

Being pregnant, what do/did you worry about?

What’s the ideal solution to you, to relieve your frustrations?

What have you tried that has not changed these frustrations?

What’s the consequence of these frustrations never going away?

How important is/were this problem & frustrations for you to push you to seek out solutions?

Did/have you ever bought anything to help you with your frustrations/problems?

What did you like and did not like about what you purchased?

Did you, have you found solutions to your pregnancy & birth problems? If so, describe them for me.

So, was that an interesting journey into yourself to see where you are, or were at, whilst pregnant? I INVITE YOU TO SHARE YOUR COMMENTS. I look forward to hearing your views and seeing what makes you tick. Thank you in advance for opening your hearts and souls and sharing with me.

Cosmic blessings of Light to you all

Please feel free to email me directly or leave a comment below.
Thank you
Colette


Treatment Choices for Pelvic Organ Prolapse

Guest writer, Elizabeth Carrollton, has written the following for you to become more knowledgeable about the possibility of Pelvic Organ Prolapse. I thought, in alignment with my views on sharing information, for the benefit of the greater good and to assist in ensuring women know they have choices and can choose how they experience their journey through life, I’ve chosen to support this and have therefore added this post. If one had to look at this topic, with the understanding that the body communicates to us via our body parts, pains, sensations etc, I would hazard a guess that POP is reflective of a body that has not had its ability to create (creating a baby; creating a masterpiece; creating happiness; creation of anything!) nurtured, supported and honoured. If you think of the pelvis, you would not be out of line when thinking of a bowl or chalice of some sort. The pelvis, and its pelvic muscles, hold a great deal, including the womb and all of the energies, magic and insights that the menstrual cycle brings with it. And the pelvis and pelvic muscles, are only too happy to hold and to do it’s job of holding. The problem, I feel, lies in that which it holds: if this is not honoured, enjoyed, nurtured or even given awareness – it could fester and inflame or possibly become irritated or it might just feel forgotten and unloved. It can’t be fun or healthy for the bowl/pelvis to have to hold all of that ‘mess’ or what can be described as under-utilised power, creativity and magnificence. And so the pelvis begins to falter in its own task, the pelvic muscles become weakened energetically, and therefore in the physical, is unable to keep the actual organs of the pelvis in a harmonious and healthy position. Consequentially, those organs then lose their place and inflict their disharmony and displacement onto other organs that then also have to take up the slack and are impacted negatively too. I could be wrong – but this is my take on a situation like Pelvic Organ Prolapse.

Elizabeth writes: “Pelvic organ prolapse (POP) is an issue that a lot of women will have to deal with at some point in their lives. For most, that time will be after menopause, but some will develop POP earlier, often during pregnancy or following childbirth. In a small percentage of women, symptoms will be troublesome enough to make surgery necessary, but for the majority of women, surgical solutions can be avoided. A variety of non-invasive treatments are available to reduce symptoms and make living with the condition easier.

Pelvic Organ Prolapse
Pelvic organ prolapse is caused by a loss of support for pelvic organs due to deterioration in the strength and tone of the pelvic floor, allowing one or several organs to slip low in the pelvis, causing excessive pressure in the vaginal area.

Transvaginal Mesh
Symptoms include pain and discomfort in the lower abdomen and bulging in the vagina or perineal area. Organs may drop into the vaginal canal and, in some cases, emerge through the vaginal opening. Urinary dysfunction can occur, leading to incontinence or urine retention. Bowel issues, such as incontinence or chronic constipation, are common.

Non-Invasive Treatment Options
Physical therapy has been shown to be effective in the treatment of mild to moderate cases of pelvic organ prolapse. Therapists work with patients to strengthen the pelvic muscles with targeted pelvic floor exercise, a strategy that is often referred to as pelvic floor muscle training. Therapy often includes the use of specialized weights for resistance exercise and biofeedback to monitor muscle function. In women with nerve damage, electrical muscle stimulation may be used to improve muscle strength and control.

Addressing lifestyle factors that may contribute to POP can reduce symptoms and prevent the disorder from progressing. Weight loss is recommended in overweight women, and smokers are encouraged to quit, since both issues can contribute to pelvic floor deterioration. Constipation can aggravate POP symptoms, so a high-fiber diet is often suggested to treat or prevent it. Caffeine, spicy foods and fried or fatty foods can irritate the bladder, worsening incontinence, so POP sufferers are encouraged to avoid them.

Using a pessary can relieve discomfort in many cases, lending support to affected organs to reduce pain and pressure and improve pelvic function. Pessaries are removable medical devices, typically made of rubber, plastic or silicon, that are placed in the vagina to help keep organs in proper position. They are made in a variety of shapes and sizes, and they are fitted by a health care professional.

shutterstock_101890432
Surgical Repair
For women with troublesome symptoms that haven’t been helped by non-invasive treatments, corrective surgery may be necessary. It is important for women to approach surgery with caution, looking into all surgical option and discussing risks and benefits with medical professionals. While vaginal mesh procedures have been very common over the last decade, safety alerts have been issued on these surgeries by the Food and Drug Administration (FDA). High rates of serious complications have been reported, including mesh erosion, organ perforation and mesh contraction, causing painful symptoms and requiring further surgery in some women. Thousands of vaginal sling lawsuits have been filed by women who are suffering from the sometimes irreversible complications of mesh surgery. Non-mesh surgeries are safer and can resolve symptoms in most women.”

I INVITE YOU TO SHARE YOUR COMMENTS :-)

Pelvic floor muscle training for treatment of pelvic organ prolapse: an assessor-blinded randomized controlled trial: http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/21484362

Harvard Medical School Family Health Guide: What to do about pelvic organ prolapse: http://www.health.harvard.edu/fhg/updates/update0805c.shtml

FDA Safety Communication: UPDATE on Serious Complications Associated with Transvaginal Placement of Surgical Mesh for Pelvic Organ Prolapse: http://www.fda.gov/MedicalDevices/Safety/AlertsandNotices/ucm262435.htm

Elizabeth Carrollton writes to inform the general public about defective medical devices and dangerous drugs for Drugwatch.com


SADness. An opportunity?

Last night I warmly received a gift that was given to me: A 7 week course in ROCKING my birth business ( MY BIRTH BUSINESS ROCKS! Karen Brody & Stephanie Dawn). It is an awesome gift I have every intention of applying its’ information and insights to my life and my Birth Business. But this is where the sadness comes in. Do I even have a Birth Business?
Pergnant African Mama

Strange question to ask perhaps, considering I’ve written a book, trained as a doula, trained as a “Rock Your Birth classes” facilitator, offer support, information and guidance relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies AND am a mother myself. I love all things baby and sincerely regard their arrivals on Earth as something sacred. So why the sadness?

Well, with all of this wonderful information, abilities, passion and inner knowledge inside of me, available to help grow and nurture mothers-to-be and their babies, I have been unable to action any of this. Not due to lacking intentions or investments, nor lacking social networking and information spreading, not even lacking practical things like logos, website and business cards. Heck, there’s my book in hard copy that can be held in someone’s hand and read through! Instead, my sadness lies in the observation that although there are a handful of committed women (and some men) in this world who are all about assisting others in growing themselves through the transition from woman to mother, the mothers themselves do not appear to be wanting to grow themselves! From my perspective, the vast majority of women are not wanting to actually do the work involved in finding out who they are, what they want and letting go of all that restricts them or holds them back in being the best version of themselves possible.

Sad, huh.

Sad, from my perspective, to observe that even with so many incredible tools (books, courses, workshops, web info, ceremonies, healing modalities and much, much more) out there for women, around the world, to use and experience – tools that will help them grow themselves so that they can better birth and parent their babies – very few women are reaching out and claiming these tools to use. After having watched Elena Tonetti’s BIRTH AS WE KNOW IT dvd (in which Elena educates mothers as to the importance of clearing out and letting go of as many of their personal issues, negative situations and individual patterning and negative programming as possible for their own benefit, but also so that the baby born to that mother does not need to ‘take on’ those same issues/energies and then is able to enjoy a Lighter load, so to speak, allowing for them to be happier and more secure babies and children, thereby ensuring the world grows into a better place because it has happier and healthier people living in it), one woman said at her own babyshower “Why do I have to do so much work beforehand? Can’t I just show up at the birth and deliver the baby and get on with it?” This causal remark, for me, said it all. And boy, it left it’s mark – and left me feeling the sadness at the state of women in general who are just not yet ready or wishing to step up and claim their healing and growth: for their benefit and that of their babies!
Preggy Belly

Now, I’m not one to be morbidly negative or see only the downfalls – actually although I’m considered practical rather then super positive, I do have an incredible knack for seeing the silver lining in almost all situations I find myself in or see others in. So I can assure you that my observations and perspectives are not rooted in negativity – they are merely observations, combined with my experience of putting ‘out there’ my services, my training and my energy and yet having no response. I can honestly claim that other than a few books sales I’ve had zero response to my ‘Birth Business’ in whichever form I’ve presented it. (Adverts, word of mouth, networking, emails, bloggin, Facebook, requests, my website, sharing, book reviews etc). Yes, that makes me sad for me as it means I question my abilities and what is that I am actually wanting to share with others, it also depletes my belief in my ability to have my needs met. However, workign through those issues as I do, my profound sadness comes from realising that there are just so many babies out there not getting their just welcomes and honouring because a whole lot of women are not yet ready to claim their power as women and as mothers.

The opportunity?

Hmmm. Perhaps the personal opportunity is for me to have the time to gather more tools so that when the mothers out there do decide to step up and action their needs more sincerely and with more authentic personal truth, I will already be there and available to help them? Perhaps. But in the mean time I still need to earn an income – grow my belief in my abilities and be the value that I am, for myself and the world I interact with. I also need to see the Love principles that I live by, manifesting in my own life. For now, I’m setting intentions, constantly looking at myself so as to ensure self growth, giving thanks for all that I do already have and honouring that this is where I am at right now – just as I honour that the goddess, the woman, is where she is right now – and that nothing stays the same as CHANGE is a constant (thank goodness for that!).

Perhaps there’s no Birth Business for now – and maybe there never will be. But for now I’m considering ME to be my business. I’m gonna be minding that business with love, organisation, courage, perseverance, peace and divinity. I’m gonna look outwards to see the reflections of what the world is showing me and I’m gonna re-write those reflections to be the world that my heart knows is my right to experience and enjoy. And then, maybe, just maybe, the world that I observe outwardly will also be tending to their individual businesses, making themselves their very own, absolute best investments EVER!!! – for their benefit and for the benefit of the babies & humanity.

I INVITE YOU TO SHARE YOUR COMMENTS :-)
Welcome!


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Birth General Invite


Odyssey Magazine Book Review

Spirit in Pregnancy & Birth has been reviewed in the latest Odyssey magazine. Go get your copy now! (AND WHILE YOU ARE AT IT, BUY YOUR COPY OF THE BOOK, here on this website, NOW) Some of the topics/articles/advertorials covered in this Odyssey issue are; What Is A Doula, The Fertile Male, Soul Connection, Access Consciousness, Book Reviews. All these are related to Fertility, Pregnancy or Birth.

The book Spirit in Pregnancy and Birth is a valuable addition for any pregnant woman or woman thinking of becoming pregnant. It can be bought as an addition to your doula or midwifery practice’s library – sharing is caring ;-) It can be bought by mothers & grandmothers for their daughters, daughters-in-law and granddaughters too.